b l u e s t a r

What did children do when there was no Myspace?

I continuously ponder what people did before Myspace was created, like back in the slightly earlier 2000's, and before that and so on. I don't do that crap site. I hate it, it's truly annoying, people just do it because their friends do it, and they do it because everyone else has one, so it eventually becomes the trendy and cool thing. But my cousin, a complete different story. She's, what, like 11, and her entire life is in that damn site. She's home like an hour before she has to go to bed, and during that time she's on Myspace. Her excuse is that there's nothing else to do. No, of course there isn't. It's not like she could, oh I don't know, read a book, do some homework, write a story, do some stupid little doodle, read a book, go on some nonconformist site that isn't owned by some conservative ass, just to name a few. But no, she goes on it constantly. Let me ask you, how long have you known how to actually work a computer? Like, even open up a simple word document. I've known since around 3rd grade or so, from school. She's in 6th grade, and she can't do anything. She has to do homework a lot, can't even open up a simple word document. Can't figure out how to save anything that she does on the computer, can't double space, types around 15 words a minute. All she knows how to do is go on Myspace, go onto websites and paste codes for layouts for Myspace, pretty much anything for Myspace. Oh, and she can chatspeak quite well. I never did get the concept much, it's just horrible looking, only idiots do it, because they can't take the time to simply type something out. But enough of that, might as well get to something happening in my life.

Well, there isn't much. I kicked butt on my Gov test, got a 93% on it, and raised my grade up to an A in that class. Uh...Oh, my birthday is this Friday, I shall finally be 18. I'm going to be going to the Science Center with my aunt to see the Titanic exhibit. My mom asked for the day off, but I'm not sure if she did. She's currently working nights, so I have no clue what her deal is.

I don't see why my cousin and brother were put into karate with me those five or so years ago. My cousin quit about a year and a half ago, and my brother, although he's signed up for it, has decided to quit. So I'm the last one, and I'm happy about it in a way. I'll be a higher belt than my brother, show it to him. I laugh at his face.

Guess I didn't say anything about orchestra, or more specifically chair placement here. Well, I'm pissed I got 4th chair. He put a damn freshman in front of me, gave him second chair. I have a feeling he wanted a guy up there, because if he wasn't here it would have gone, Abby, Rebeccah, me, Lynn, Andrea, and George, all the way in the back. And it also pisses me off that he put Abby as concert master. I would have rather had Becca as concert master than her, she sucks. She was second chair last year, she didn't deserve it. BUt she barely got it this year. Apparently there is a two point difference in scores between fourth chair, me, and first chair, Abby. I got a 31, she got a 33. So there's a tie somewhere in there. But I don't care too much, or won't. Once honor orchestra is over, I'm going on my rampage. Going to challenge Becca, and I'm determined to beat her and get third chair, then I'll challenge the freshman, and take his spot as second, and then I'll take on Abby, and get concert master. Then I'd have something good for me in my high school career. Hopefully Lynn can get up to second chair, we have a pact to get the top two spots. She said as long as we can get Abby out of concert master, she'll let me be and not challenge me if I get concert master.

Okay, I have no more to say...I don't think. So I guess I'll leave it at all that nice little complaining or whatever.

Posted on Nov 21 2007 by Amber + 1 Comments

Today like, sucks.

I have no clue what's up today. I must be like semi bipolar or something, I don't know. But today I'm feeling so depressed. At violin lessons I almost started to cry because I screwed up on my positions exercise. And then I got home and just felt like crap. Like all my energy was drained, mentally more than physically. And I'm still feeling like that. I'm also somewhat pissed right now because I had to tape Avatar, but the stupid tape didn't tape it. It took me ages to catch up on all the episodes, and I finally a caught up to where I'd be with the current season, but not anymore. Maybe I'll get lucky and find it online somewhere.

EDIT: I finally checked IMDB too see who the cast of Merlin was. I am right, Miranda Richardson was in in, she played Mab and the Lady of the Lake. I was always freaking out when I saw the movie, saying it was her but wasn't completey sure. Of course the real reason I had checked because Helena Bonham Carter also plays someone in Merlin, I just started wondering because I was looking at something with OotP, and she's the one who plays Bellatrix.

Posted on Oct 20 2007 by Amber + 1 Comments

Well, there is like no real good title for this...

Okay, so it's apparently been awhile since I've done anything, updated and such here. And at the moment, I'm kind of out of what's been going on, or quite a bit of it. I'm actually currently feeling like a social reject, or loner, or loser, or whatever. But instead of complaining about everything, I'll just get into the larger things.

Right, so first thing is first; I'm out of my house. My dad seriously, and I do mean seriously, pissed me off, and for the last time, so I left. I'm not 18 yet, no, though I will be shortly enough. But my mom isn't forcing me home, and I'm quite fine over here at my grandma's. I'm better of, it feels as if my life is somewhat better as well. I have to share a room with my cousin at the moment, but it isn't too bad. And I'm going to help my grandma clean out my cousin's old room (she's lived with my grandma since she was like 5 or so, and she's moved bedrooms), so then I'll have that to myself. And... well, my damn father, thanks to him, my relationship with my mother is kind of screwed too. We hardly see each other, last time I saw her was Thursday, for like maybe a half hour, because we had to go place the order for my cap and gown and class ring. Of course, we didn't talk much then. And we talk on the phone everyday for like a minute, maybe two sometimes. But as you can see, we aren't talking much. But that's how he is, he has to make it so he wins. I can't do anything with her, like they were going to the movies last night, I didn't go because he would be there. I had to get my grandma to drive me to karate the other day, because I knew that asshole would drive with my mom to take my brother, just to be an ass. And now, thanks to him no doubt, I'm not on speaking terms with my mother either, as of today I suppose. Why? Well, I'm assuming it's because they had another fight, like they always do, and since she said she can't find her phone she must have thrown it out of anger, and so she didn't talk to me all day, though I was constantly leaving her voicemails because I wanted to know if she'd go see a movie with me today.

Heheh, LOLing. Right now I'm watching the Star Wars episode of Family Guy. I've seen it before on Fox, but right now it's on Adult Swim. Perhaps it isn't as finny as the first time, but it's still funny. I love the part that just came on, Cleveland/R2-D2 pulls out and handgun and starts shooting at the tai-fighters, and when he hits one he's all like "that's how we do it in my neighborhood bitch!". I love Family Guy, there are some funny episodes.

Yeah, that was a bit of a randomness, but still. I'm not talking to my family, or at least not my parents and brother. But that kind of sucks I'm not living at home. My cat, Rosco, I miss him so much. He's literally lost without me, my brother says he sits and lays in front of my door, just staring at it. And when I go home to get clothes and my school stuff I need, he follows me into my room and just sits there, with a distant look on his face. I really wish I could bring him over here, but the two dogs over here, I wouldn't trust them. If I had any money, I'd get a kennel, like one of those big dog ones, and keep him in there when I wasn't home, then let him out to roam around the room when I am. Then there's poor Spook, my dad, who has to always be the one in control, is so mean to her. My grandma is going to give my mom a number for an American Bulldog Rescue, so they can take her and fine her a home that people won't be asses to her. But whatever.

I cannot wait until college. I'm sick of school, but the first quarter has barely ended. I'm not helping my GPA any. I'm seriously pissed off at myself for my grade in AP English. I have no clue how I did it, but I managed to keep an A in that class, the class which so many people last year said not to take, a class which apparently is so difficult there's only 30 people taking it out of over 500 seniors. But the problem was I was a borderline A, usually 90. something. And I was completely focused on my essay for my outside reading novel and my reflective journal, hoping to get A's on those so I could keep my grade, I forgot about my damn rewrite for my 'One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest' essay, and that lost me 50 points, and 2 percent. It pissed me off so bad. And because I was so busy with AP English and AP Gov, I was oblivious to my pre-cal hw. As I see it, AP classes come before others, and because of that I only did half of my hw assignments for math. That, and plus the fact that I've never gotten anything over a low B on my math tests, which he counts as 80% of our grade, I have a low B in there. I think I screwed myself over in AP Bio too. I'm missing a movie, so that's 10 points I won't get, and I don't think I got all of my study group hours in. But it's my damn group's fault, they never wanted to meet. It's a good thing I get a new study group next quarter. Oh, and I can just forget about AP Gov. I work my ass off for that class, and what do I have to show for it? I can't even get a damn B on the tests, and I study so hard. It just sucks.

Okay...well, there is one good thing about orchestra this year, just one really. Latham chose me for one of the students who gets to go to district honor orchestra. Though I'm rather pissed, he put me as a second violin. This is me second year in the first violin section, but he puts me as a second. What makes it worse is that Abby is the only first violin part. I don't care what he says, I'm better than her, I know I am. It seems Lynn is the only one who seems to know that, though she's better too. But it doesn't matter too much I suppose, because we've already made our decision; once chair placement auditions come, Lynn and I are going the from, concert master and second chair. I'm sure we can do it. And as I write this I'm quite glad none of my friends from school know this blog exists, because if they read this, one in particular, no doubt she'd tell Abby about it, or if not she'd probably be a bit upset with me or something. But there's no way I'd let my friends see this, not from school at least. Last thing I need to for them to see what kind of freak I am and what I'm really thinking and feeling.

But it seems I have gotten off topic a bit. I was talking about how I can't wait until I got to college. This year of school sucks. My friends I sat with last year, they're friends have the same lunch this year, so there's no room for me at the table. But it doesn't matter, last year I didn't belong there really. Every lunch I'd just sit there, not getting in on the conversation, just listening to them talk and have fun and such. The one time I would actually talk was when we were talking to class, when Janelle and Chris would go ahead, and Maggie and I would talk about whatever. Last year was good, Maggie and I got pretty close, after we barely talked sophomore year. But I have one class with her this year, we sit on opposite sides of the room. I don't really talk to her that much. Janelle I don't even talk to that much. We have quite a few classes together, but we still don't talk. She has Rebbecca and Donald to talk to. But what I was trying to get to is socially this year sucks for me. Every day during lunch I go into the library and sit there, doing homework usually. But perhaps, there maybe is a very slight chance I won't be some loner in college. But whatever, no need to think about that right now.

Uh... I don't know what else to write. There probably is a lot more, but I can't think of anything really. Guess I'll try to update this place a bit, blog more often.

Posted on Oct 15 2007 by Amber + 2 Comments

Yeah, it's been some time, stupid school

Okay, so I'll just say this straight off; school totally sucks this year. I suppose that it might, and that's just a very slight might, be getting ever so slightly better, but it's just no last year. Last year was awesome, had friends to hang with, loved (most of) my classes, made 1st violin and everything. But this year... I spend my lunches in the library, alone, doing hw. I don't really talk to any of the few friends I have. Of the few I do have, I hardly have any classes with them. My friend who was in AP Bio with me, she dropped because it "isn't something that she needs for her future career". Like that even matters. I'm not going to need orchestra, or... well, english or government for my future career, but I still take those two classes. The case is that I'm required to take those two classes really, but most of my other classes I don't, with the exception of math. I already have my three science credits, Thinking Science, Acc. Bio and AP Physics, and I'm going to have 5 when I graduate, since I'm doing Chemistry and AP Bio this year. Though senior credit checks are on Monday, I'm going to see if I can tweak my schedule some there. I'll finish off the semester of chem, though I don't really want to take it right now. I hate my class, it's filled with average, or more below average, idiot juniors. At the least I should have been in Acc. Chem, but of course, with stupid orchestra screwing up everyone's schedules, I couldn't. I'm thinking maybe next semester, if I do change, I'll TA or something.

Hmm... there's been a lot of stuff...kind of. Well, I got a new hair style after like... well, like 6 or 7 years. Last time I changed my hair was I think the summer before 5th grade, when I moved from bangs to no bangs. My hair has been like that for ages, with the occasional trimming. But since I was getting my senior picture taken for the yearbook yesterday, and because I am a senior and in need of something new, my hair is now layered, which looks rather nice, and I have some deep red streaks in it as well. It doesn't look bad at all, though the streaks aren't really noticeable with my dark hair. Okay, well, I'm kind of getting tired, so I'll leave everything at that? Yeah, sure... so that be it for now.

Posted on Sep 08 2007 by Amber + 1 Comments

It's been awhile... but I've been lazy

Been quite awhile since I updated I suppose. Quite a bit of stuff has happened, though not much of it is important. Let's just go with what's fresh in my mind then, shall we?

I went to see OotP today. I wanted to walk out of the movie within the first ten minutes, but I didn't. It was just horrid. There were a few things, a very few things, that I thought were okay. But from the beginning, I was thinking how it was wrong. I hate the movies, yet I still go to see them. I should have gone to see Hairspray instead, still need to see it.

I finished Deathly Hallows on Tuesday, right before I went to bed. It was pretty good. Still, the 5th and 6th books were better in my opinion. And I wasn't very fond of the epilogue either, as I read it it seemed to be poorly written. But that's perhaps there didn't need to be the same detail and such as in the book. I'm quite sad that the series is over, and wasn't top happy about all the deaths (I can't believe they killed off Fred and Hedwig, just so mean. Feel kind of bad for Dobby as well, though he was a good little elf). I suppose that's all in the HP news.

Um... went to Maui, for my aunt's wedding. I kind of miss it, out condo we were staying at was right on the beach, so we left the balcony door open so the breeze would come in. The only thing I hated about it (other than having to go to my aunt's wedding) was that my laptop was busted, so I couldn't take it to go online. That was 5 days with no internet at all. it was horrible. And my grandpa was afraid to get separated anywhere, so we all (meaning my mom, dad, brother, me, and my grandma, grandpa and annoying cousin) were always together, or nearly. A lot of the time Brittany, my cousin, ended up keeping with us more, and it was annoying. She always came over to our condo, since there's was next door, and bugging us. We eventually locked the door between them. The plane home was so bad. Go figure, on the way there and back the only rides were later ones. Our's left at 8:45 back home. We got the the airport at 5:10. We got there so early, that we had to wait for the people to get there to check our bags and such. Then I got the window seat home. We got home at nearly 4 in the morning AZ time. I didn't sleep on the plane. So I stayed up straight for 23 hours, since I didn't fall asleep until i was home, and after I had played with the kittens(I had been so tired I had fallen asleep on the ground, with my head in my arms on my bed). Then I only slept for three hours, and didn't go to bed until late that night.

Nothing else now. School is starting too, a few weeks. I still haven't finished my AP Bio summer assignment, I'll try to do it this week. I'm somewhat frightened, though not really. Being a senior, it means this is my last year. It means that my life depends on whether I get into college, and I need to get into college. If I don't get into a university, then there's no point in life if I can't get in, and start towards my career. It kind of sucks, but whatever.

Posted on Jul 28 2007 by Amber + 3 Comments

She is the most amazing person ever!!

I love Maggie, I really do. She's, like, the sweetest person ever, and the most awesome friend. Seriously, last night she totally changed my crappy and tiresome night into awesome. She offered to give me a ride home for graduation, even though I live the opposite way from her. And then when I got in the car, she gave me a box of cookies she made for me, and a card too. The card is so awesomely her.

Dear Amber,
I have so much I would like to tell you, but there are no words I can seem to use. You have made my junior year worth while. You were always available when I needed someone. Amber, you have inspired and impacted my life so much.You will probably never know the extent your friend has meant to me. I cannot thank you enough!!
Awesome, Marvelous, the BEST Excellent friend, Really amazing person and violinist(I think you play wonderfully).
Love,
Maggie

Like I said, most awesome friend ever! What she wrote was hardly the case even, but she's so uber awesome and cheery, and always has a positive outlook on things. It's too bad school's out, I won't see her until next year...

But yeah, school is out!! Now I only have one more year to go...senior year. I shall rule the school, friends with me. And my stupid brother shall cower as a freshman!!! Mwuahahaha! Anyways, these past two days have been quite blah. Yesterday, I got out early though, since my mom had to take my brother to his 8th grade promotion. Today, I totally screwed my spanish grade up. Somehow, despite my excellent test grades and perfect homework in there, I only had a 90% even. Stupid final probably dropped me down to a B. Just what I need, another B. Physics was so random. Mrs. McClure didn't give a care what we did. Heck, there were only three kids in there! Then Sarah's boyfriend Stephen (Stupid Bond, if you read this Megan), came in to hang out with her. She just put Mythbusters on for us, and kept going in and out of the room all hour. But oh well, now school is out!

More news... well, I'm getting yet another new sinsei for karate. Fourth one, it's sad really. I don't like him very much either. Of course, I didn't like the current one, but whatever. I just hope this stops, even though I only have two more semesters until I have to stop going to my current class, and to the adult classes. So, I got my red belt, finally. I honestly don't think I deserve it, but whatever. That means only two solid belts until I get my black belt. I'm guessing it'll take a bit less than 5 years? Not too bad I suppose... Nothing else much going on in my life. Though this is a bit old info, awhile ago we started feeding this stray cat outside the house, just leaving the food out there for her. And then we would bring her in for an hour or so, when it was hot outside each day. So, now she's living in the house, with her four week old kittens may I add. Yeah, she was pregnant, and had them in our bathroom. Technically, she had half of one in my mom and dad's room, two and a half in the bathroom, and one in my brother's room, where they're all currently situated. That comes to a total of 8 cats in the house, but no big. We have homes for all the kittens, now we just need to find one for Willow (the mother). Anyways, the kittens have started to open their eyes. They are so cute! But it's the two my brother gets to name who have, one of mine has partially, don't think the other. But they're trying to run around now, or at least get out of the box. It'll be a bit longer before they can actually walk properly. Er... I guess that's it really to say. Going to take my SAT's Sunday, Hawaii is in a few weeks as well (not that I'm looking up to it.) So yeah, that's it. Though I'm going to try and fill in the info on the about me thingy, so... well, bye.

Posted on May 30 2007 by Amber + 5 Comments

so it's been awhile...

It's been quite awhile since I blogged anything, so I thought I'd do a quick one. Why? Because I was supposed to be in bed over an hour ago. My dad yells at me to go to bed since I "have to be at school tomorrow at 8". Yeah, who cares. I'm doing nothing, the teachers have already given finals last week, despite these last two days being finals days. But my stupid brother gets to stay up as late as he wanted, because it's his eight grade promotion tomorrow, and they're also letting him ditch school until he has to be there for the stupid promotion ceremony. It's so annoying, they keep calling it his graduation. It is not a graduation!!! Honestly, they keep calling it that, so it seems that when I actually graduate, from high school, next year, it'll be nothing. Whatever, I could care less. Because he's going to face hell next year, to the best of my abilities. There's no way I, a soon to be senior, will let him, a soon to he freshman, get away with a breeze in high school. I know quite a few band kids who can give him a hard time there, and I have others who could do it elsewhere. Anyways, enough of my ranting of what's currently in my head. My battery is nearly dead, so I'll just wait until tomorrow to tell what's been actually going on, and like in the real world, not in my little world of Amberton in my head.

Posted on May 29 2007 by Amber + 1 Comments

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